NATO supports British rioters, threatens air strikes

Early Wednesday morning, a press release was sent from NATO headquarters in Brussels, Belgium stating that, in light of the current unrest in Britain and the government’s lackadaisical reaction to it, NATO no longer considers the Cameron government the legitimate voice of the British people.

An international force consisting of naval, air and ground forces from eight NATO countries, including The US, Canada, France, The Netherlands, Belgium and Italy will soon be headed to the North Atlantic in a show of solidarity with the British people’s uprising against law-enforcement authorities in London and other British cities that has been going on for several days now.

 “By its actions and inactions, starting with the unlawful shooting of Mark Duggan, the British authorities under Premier David Cameron have proven that they do not have the best interests of the people of the United Kingdom as their priority,” read the statement.

“While NATO considers it to be the people themselves who must take the initiative to oust Cameron and establish a responsible government, we will take action to ensure that the abuses of British authorities is brought to an end, even if it necessitates air strikes and other direct military action.”

Prime Minister David Cameron, fresh back from an idyllic holiday break in Tuscany, had his office issue a counter-statement, calling the NATO action “quite mad” and saying that the people “clearly support Mr. Cameron” and the rioters are organized by a coalition of “Labor, the LDP, Al Qaeda and radical foreign elements.”

 President Obama said to reporters this afternoon that “one thing is certain now; Cameron must go. And by ‘go,’ I don’t mean ‘go on vacation.’”


The president also withdrew the US ambassador to Great Britain, as did most other NATO countries.

Embattled Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi has offered to contribute troops to the NATO efforts in Britain but says that his calls to NATO headquarters have not been returned.